sesheta66: (Highlands Sesheta)
[personal profile] sesheta66
Title: Obsessed
Author: [livejournal.com profile] sesheta_66
Rating: General
Word Count: ~530
Pairing/Characters: Harry/Draco (pre-slash)
Challenge: Written for [livejournal.com profile] janicechess's birthday, this is a continuation of the "flippant cactus" drabble she wrote at Prophecy during one of our drabble sessions. It also happens to fit my [livejournal.com profile] 100quills prompt #045 - "name".
Warnings: No beta. Please point out any errors you find.
Summary: Draco Malfoy borrows Millicent's new and rather vocal plant to amuse himself.
Disclaimer: The characters contained herein are not mine. They belong to JK Rowling and her publishers. No money is being made from this fiction, which is presented for entertainment purposes only.

Read the original fic, Millicent Bulstrode and the Flippant Cactus before reading this.


Draco grinned as he carried Millicent's new plant into the Great Hall, its flippant remarks flowing freely.

Every time Draco said someone's name out loud, the cactus would insult them. At first, it merely called everyone a pompous git. But it seemed to remember the names it had already used, because it came up with more creative ones over time.

Draco spent half the night before saying 'Harry Potter' over and over again. Some of the insults it had come out with had reduced Draco to tears, and his side still hurt from the stitch he had had in it from laughing so hard that morning, when he had carried on.

As predictable as always, Potter ambled over to the Slytherin table to stick his nose in. Well, okay, he probably had heard Draco saying 'Harry Potter' a few times, but whatever.

"Malfoy."

"To what do we owe the pleasure of the great Harry Potter's company?" Draco asked in his usual drawl.

"Harry Potter is a twit."

Draco giggled, even if it wasn't nearly as funny as some of the insults it had come out with last night.

Potter raised his eyebrows, looking bemused, at the cactus. "I heard my name, so I came over." He turned back to Draco. "What have you done, taught your plant to insult me? That's constructive."

"Actually, it insults anyone when Draco says their name," Blaise interjected.

"And of course my name would be at the top of your list. I'm flattered."

"Oh, don't flatter yourself, Potter."

"Potter is an arrogant git."

Draco scowled at the plant. It was back to boring insults.

Potter raised his eyebrows. "All I know is that I heard my name several times already, Malfoy."

"Malfoy is a poncy git."

Potter chuckled as the plant insulted Draco. "I couldn't have said it better myself," he said to the cactus. "So what else can you tell me about Draco Malfoy?" he asked, shooting Draco a grin.

"Draco Malfoy is obsessed with Harry Potter."

Draco turned red. Apparently the cactus did more than simply insult people. Stupid plant.

"Well, well, well," Potter said to Draco. He smiled almost sinfully, and winked at Draco before leaning over to whisper in his ear. "Imagine that," he breathed before turning to the plant to say, "Thank you for the information about Malfoy."

Draco cringed and braced himself for what the plant would say next.

"Malfoy called Potter's name all night long."

Potter laughed. "All night?" he asked. "I didn't know you cared, Draco." He winked at him again, and he walked away chuckling.

"Draco needs to -- "

"SHUT UP!" Draco screamed at the plant, drowning out the latest statement. That hadn't gone the way he had wanted. Not at all.

Looking at his fellow Slytherins staring at him, he yelled, "What?"

Between snorts of laughter, Blaise managed to sputter, "All night, Draco? Must have been some sweet dreams about the Boy Who Lived!"

The entire table collapsed into fits of laughter, as Draco took the plant, covering up whatever it was saying in response to Blaise's use of his name, back to Millicent. Before it did any more damage.

Date: 2007-08-26 03:06 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] tes-aidan.livejournal.com
Oh Poor Draco! Nothing ever works out like he plans, does it?

Date: 2007-08-26 03:18 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] sesheta-66.livejournal.com
Sadly, no. But only when he tries to get one over on Harry. Silly boy. He just needs to accept his attraction to Harry, and things will work out much better for him.

*pets Draco*

Date: 2007-08-26 03:29 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] thrnbrooke.livejournal.com
Oh I love it! Wanna know more from the plant? Someone keep saying Draco's name!!!

Date: 2007-08-26 04:02 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] sesheta-66.livejournal.com
*giggles*

I just "borrowed" the theme for this birthday fic, so you might have to ask [livejournal.com profile] janicechess for a continuation. ;)

Date: 2007-08-26 04:55 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] sesheta-66.livejournal.com
Glad you found it amusing. ;)

Date: 2007-08-26 04:56 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] melmoe1.livejournal.com
LOL! That was brilliant, Swhnn (pronounced Shwoon, short for She Who Has No Nickname) *g*

Date: 2007-08-26 05:02 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] sesheta-66.livejournal.com
Why thank you, Bob.

~SWHNN :o)

Date: 2007-08-26 09:10 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] tajjer.livejournal.com
I never thought herbology could be so much fun! Heehee. Poor Draco. But he had it coming, really. He shouldn't trust a flippant cactus with something as private as calling Harry's name all night. Really.

Date: 2007-08-26 09:35 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] sesheta-66.livejournal.com
Heh. He actually only said Harry's name over and over again to get the plant to insult him. So he didn't think anything of it. But out of context, it does sound rather ... interesting. *giggles*

Date: 2007-08-26 03:10 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] night-childe25.livejournal.com
OMG! *wipes tears from eyes* That was so funny. Thanks for the laugh.

Date: 2007-08-26 03:28 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] sesheta-66.livejournal.com
Hee! Thanks much. *hands you tissue*

At Prophecy, a bunch of slashers sat in a room writing drabbles, and the drabble that started this was one of those. It was great fun! I'm glad I managed to continue it with similar humour.
(deleted comment)

Date: 2007-08-26 09:03 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] sesheta-66.livejournal.com
Heheheh. Yeah, the "flippant" part of the cactus doesn't just stop at insults. Poor Draco.

Date: 2007-08-26 10:04 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] enchanted-jae.livejournal.com
Oh, Draco. *laughs at him*

Date: 2007-08-26 10:10 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] sesheta-66.livejournal.com
*giggles*

*winks at Harry ... pets poor Draco*

Date: 2007-08-27 04:23 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] aquila-star.livejournal.com
Bwahahahaha Brilliant!

Date: 2007-08-27 04:35 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] sesheta-66.livejournal.com
Hee - glad I could amuse you.
(deleted comment)

Date: 2007-08-27 04:39 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] sesheta-66.livejournal.com
You are quite welcome.

I didn't realize until after Prophecy that we weren't on each other's flists, *rolls eyes* so I didn't know about your birthday. Had I known, I would have written earlier ... but then it wouldn't have been the flippant cactus, so it all worked out in the end. :o) Yay for birthdays that last for months!

Hope you're feeling well today, sweetie.

Date: 2007-08-27 07:40 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] kaykayen.livejournal.com
OMG! I got a great laugh out of this! Great continuation of the original drabble! Poor Draco's little Slytherin plan sure backfired on him!

Date: 2007-08-28 12:16 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] sesheta-66.livejournal.com
Poor Draco's little Slytherin plan sure backfired on him!

Aww ... don't they always?

*pets Draco*

Date: 2007-08-27 08:49 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dysonrules.livejournal.com
Neville's a genius. He hides it so well. LOL!

Date: 2007-08-28 12:27 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] sesheta-66.livejournal.com
Hmmm ... I suspect you are referring to the other drabble in which Neville is the professor?

And yes, he hides it well. *g*

Date: 2007-08-28 02:25 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dysonrules.livejournal.com
I figured Neville was the one that engineered the cactus to begin with...

(I love secretly brilliant Neville...)

Date: 2007-08-28 09:34 pm (UTC)

Date: 2007-11-30 11:30 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] w-aterlily.livejournal.com
I want a plant like that! :P

Date: 2007-11-30 12:40 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] sesheta-66.livejournal.com
Hee! I don't know about that. I like to keep my feelings to myself, and I don't think I'd want a plant blabbing them around. Of course, if I got Harry out of the deal, I suppose that'd be okay. ;o)

Date: 2007-11-30 02:23 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] w-aterlily.livejournal.com
yes that would be very nice ^^

Date: 2007-11-30 03:29 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] sesheta-66.livejournal.com
Not that I'd say no to Draco either, but Harry is ♥. *drools*

Date: 2007-12-01 06:58 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] w-aterlily.livejournal.com
I totally agree with you ^^

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