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Christmas 2016 Fic: Reset (H/D, rated R) - Part 8
Title: Reset – Part 8
Author:![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
sesheta_66
Pairing(s): Harry/Draco
Rating: R overall
Word Count: ~20K overall
Summary: Forgetting the past isn't always possible or practical. Dwelling on it isn't constructive. Moving beyond it, into what lies ahead, can be just the thing to help us heal. And friends? Well, they make it all – past, present and future – worth living.
Author's Notes: Written for![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-community.gif)
dracoharry100's Christmas Challenge, prompts #1: ugly Christmas sweater, #5: lonely during the holidays, and #22: apart for Christmas, and slythindor100's 25 Days of Draco and Harry, prompts #13: Christmas cracker and #14: mistletoe.
Disclaimer: All Harry Potter characters herein are the property of J.K. Rowling and Bloomsbury/Scholastic. No copyright infringement is intended.
Previous: Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6 | Part 7
Reset – Part 8
"Harry?"
Narcissa's voice pierced through his thoughts. "Hmm?"
He caught Draco frowning at him, but quickly looked away. "I'm sorry, what was that?"
She chuckled. "You seem a bit distracted."
There's an understatement. Why yes, Narcissa, as a matter of fact I am. While I’m sure this meal is perfectly lovely, I'd really rather be upstairs shagging your son. "I'm sorry," he said instead. "I'm afraid I'm a bit tired after our game."
She smiled warmly, then turned her gaze to Draco and back again. "Draco tells me you fell asleep while he was in the shower."
His eyes widened and he glanced desperately at Draco. What else had he told her? Draco's blank look told him nothing. "Er …"
"It's quite alright," she said. "I went through my NEWT year as well, and I know how hard they work you."
Harry lifted his napkin to his mouth in an attempt to cover the wash of relief that no doubt had just poured over his features. "I think it might have been all the fresh air out on the pitch."
"Of course, of course. You two were out there for a long time."
Harry smiled. This he could talk about. Quidditch was a great diversion. "It's wonderful out there. You have the greatest space for it, and those spells … well, they're incredible."
"So I understand."
Harry's mouth fell open. "You mean you don't fly out there yourself?"
She chuckled. "Heavens no."
A deep rumble announced Draco's amusement as well. "Perhaps you should, Mother."
"Oh, nonsense," she said and mock-slapped him with her napkin. "I'll leave that to you boys."
"I don't know," Harry said in challenge. "I know a few girls from school that would love to take a run at that pitch. The blokes too, of course." She raised her brows in interest. "I'm not kidding. Hogwarts is great and all that, but there's nothing quite like the privacy of a pitch away from the crowd. And yours? Well, it's incredible."
"Yes." Her voice was amused. "You've said that."
"Sorry, but it really is. Not just the spells controlling the temperature – Draco tells me they repel snow and rain as well – but the surroundings. The Manor grounds are spectacular, and the scent of the forest and gardens surrounding you when you're up in the air?" He breathed in deeply, as though he were back out there, then let out a long and contented sigh.
Draco looked at him curiously, as though he'd never seen him before. Realising he was quite probably making a fool of himself, he scooted back in his chair. Narcissa looked bemused, her eyes sparkling. "Yes, it is very much a beautiful home. I remember being equally enamoured by it the first time Lucius brought me here."
The mention of her husband threw an instant chill into the air. Harry at once stifled a shiver, recalling the first time he'd been to the Manor. "Well, anyway, I'm looking forward to everyone's reaction when I tell them how incr– er, how impressive the pitch is." He smiled wickedly. "They'll be so jealous."
Narcissa and Draco laughed and the frosty air warmed again.
After the dishes were cleared, Harry stood up, at once both anxious to get back to school and nervous about being alone with Draco again. He shook Narcissa's hand. "Thanks so much for having me to your home again, Narcissa."
"You're welcome any time, Harry." He wasn’t so sure that would be true if she'd seen them upstairs. "I would ask a favour of you, though."
He hesitated. Was this when she would start asking him to help Lucius or something else he was not prepared to do? He would do a lot for Draco, especially now, but his father was off limits. He was where he belonged and there he would stay. "Yes?"
"I wonder if I might keep my son here for a little longer. Would you mind making your way back to Hogwarts without him, just this time?"
He smiled, a weight lifted from his shoulders. "Of course not." Not only would this help Narcissa, but it would give Harry time to figure out how to apologise to Draco. Or something. "I'll just get my things and be on my way."
When Draco made to accompany him, panic rose in his chest. "It's okay. I think I can find my way."
"Nonsense," said Narcissa. "Lealia will show you back to Draco's room." No sooner had she spoken the name than the elf appeared.
Once again, Harry's heart settled. "See you back at school," he said to Draco, not meeting his eyes but unable to stop himself from glancing at those lips that he longed to taste once more. Who was he kidding? Once more would never be enough. He fled before he said or did something even more stupid.
***
Draco watched them leave, shaken by the mere glimpse Harry had given his mouth. Was he remembering their kiss too? Had it shaken him like it had Draco? He dragged his tongue over his lips but the taste of Harry was now gone. As absurd as it seemed, he wanted it back. He wanted that moment back. Harry's vulnerable features as he awoke and tried to focus. Harry's smile. Harry's touch. Harry's mouth.
"Well, that was a lovely visit." Narcissa's voice shook him out of his stupor and Draco turned to face her, willing himself to look less dazed than he felt.
He nodded. "It was nice to get back out on the pitch."
She grinned. "Harry seemed to enjoy that very much."
Harry's animated face swam before him again, his features alight with child-like enthusiasm and his contrasting voice describing things only truly appreciated as an adult. He was a contradiction unto himself, never ceasing to amaze Draco, no matter how much he thought he knew about him. "He did, didn't he?"
Narcissa studied him with that familiar gaze that made his skin crawl, like she could see everything inside him by merely concentrating enough. He used Occlumancy as a matter of habit by now, so he knew that not to be the case, but still. He couldn't help but feel she could see right through him.
"He's very important to you, isn't he?" she asked.
Surprised by the question, though he knew he shouldn't be, he took a while to answer. "He's become a good friend." Not the full truth of the matter, but it wasn't untrue.
"Your only one, perhaps?" Now she was treading on ground he might have found irritating at the start of term, but now … not so much.
He smiled weakly. "For a while, yes, I suppose he was. But I like to think things are changing, however slowly."
She reached out and grabbed his hand, pulling it to rest beneath her chin. "I'm so pleased." And she looked pleased. "He's a very important ally to have," she added.
Draco felt a sting of pain lance through him and he withdrew his hand from her grasp. "You sound like Father," he warned.
She didn't appear to pick up on his tone and ploughed ahead. "Perhaps, but it's true. He's a good person to have in your corner."
Anger bubbled inside until Draco thought he might explode. He expected things like this from his father, but not his mother. Lucius was the master manipulator and user of others. Narcissa, however pragmatic she'd been over the years, still had a heart. Or so he'd thought.
"Is that all you think people are?" he said without thinking or even trying to hide his outrage. "Tools to be manipulated or coerced into doing something for you? For me?" He stood up and began to pace. Before his mother could respond, he continued. "Harry is my friend. He is not someone I cozied up to in order to wave him about when I need something. He is a person with courage and convictions and feelings and a good heart and … and …" Words escaped him, he was so enraged. "You'll forgive me, Mother, but I think I need to leave before I say something I cannot take back."
"Sit down, Draco." Her words broached no argument.
He did not leave the room, but likewise he did not sit. "I think I'll stand, thanks."
"Very well." She crossed her hands and placed them in her lap. "You are right. Harry is a person and that is worth far more than an ally. I just wanted to be sure you felt the same way."
What? "Excuse me?"
"Please, sit." She motioned to his favourite chair and he sat down. "Do you remember, as a child, when you tried to befriend him?"
He winced inwardly. That still stung. "Yes."
"You'd been so disappointed, so upset."
Because he chose Weasley over me. He nodded.
"At the time, you'd gone after Harry Potter. You wanted to ally yourself with the Boy Who Lived. You weren't after friendship, you were after power."
"But …" She was right. He'd heard of Harry Potter since he'd been a small child. His father had hinted that the boy might be the next Dark Lord. And there could be no better person to have at your side.
"I see that the two of you seem to have grown quite close in a short time. I'm glad for you, Draco, but I can't help but worry, as a Mother. I don't want to see you set yourself up for disappointment again." She took a sip of her tea, letting her words settle before continuing. "That boy – that man is as genuine as they come. If you aren't the same, you'll lose whatever you've gained this year."
"Lose him as a friend, you mean?"
"I mean that Harry cares about people and trusts people. If he didn't, he never would have testified on our behalf, nor would he have accepted my invitation to lunch. But I don't think he would take too kindly to being manipulated, and I don't believe you'd want the wrath of Harry Potter following you through life."
He nodded. Never let it be said that Narcissa Malfoy was a stupid woman, no matter her choice in husband. She was his mother and would support him, no matter what, but she wasn't blind to his failings in the past.
"I'm not Father," he said, as much to reassure her as himself. "And I don't want to be." He saw a smile creep slowly across her face. "Not anymore."
***
When he returned to the school, it was with a somewhat heavy heart. His mother, no matter her brave front and anger at his actions, missed her husband. It would be a lonely Christmas for her this year. It seemed almost unfair that Draco had finally begun to move on with his life, but that she remained trapped in hers.
"Hey, Malfoy, you joining us in the Great Hall?"
He looked at Seamus, at the atrocity he was currently sporting. "What is that?"
Seamus beamed and twirled around slowly. "It's my ugly Christmas sweater. Isn't it great?"
Draco stood, inexplicably mesmerised by the elves on the front of the sweater hammering away, making toys and tossing them into a box. Once filled, the box toppled its contents into a cart which got wheeled away to the back of the sweater where another group of elves wrapped the toys and tossed them into Santa's sack for delivery. Like wizard pictures, the figures on Seamus' sweater moved about merrily, causing a dizzying feeling in the pit of Draco's stomach. "It's certainly ugly."
"I know, right?" He grinned madly. "You should get yourself one."
Draco nearly choked, imagining Narcissa's reaction to that. "No, I think I'm good."
"Suit yourself." He shrugged. "But you should come join us in the Hall."
Draco tried to ask why, but Seamus had already taken off. He decided to find out for himself, but not before going to his dorm and dropping off his things and the care package his mother had insisted he bring back with him.
As he approached the Great Hall, he heard boisterous laughter, spontaneous singing and much noise. He stopped at the door to watch the utter mayhem ensuing within. The house tables had been separated and rearranged into multiple craft tables, at which students and a couple of teachers made bows, wreaths, Christmas crackers and ornaments for the trees. He grinned as random plants whipped by overhead, coming to stop above pairs of people. When they looked up, laughed and leaned in for a kiss, he realised it was mistletoe.
He didn't see Harry anywhere, but for once didn't shy away. He could catch up with him later. Then they could talk – or not – about what had happened. He touched his lower lip absently, hoping that Harry felt the same way he did, but determined to make the most of what time he had left at Hogwarts regardless.
Seamus caught sight of him and waved him over to his table. Draco smiled and stepped into the fray.
Part 9
Author:
sesheta_66Pairing(s): Harry/Draco
Rating: R overall
Word Count: ~20K overall
Summary: Forgetting the past isn't always possible or practical. Dwelling on it isn't constructive. Moving beyond it, into what lies ahead, can be just the thing to help us heal. And friends? Well, they make it all – past, present and future – worth living.
Author's Notes: Written for
dracoharry100's Christmas Challenge, prompts #1: ugly Christmas sweater, #5: lonely during the holidays, and #22: apart for Christmas, and slythindor100's 25 Days of Draco and Harry, prompts #13: Christmas cracker and #14: mistletoe.Disclaimer: All Harry Potter characters herein are the property of J.K. Rowling and Bloomsbury/Scholastic. No copyright infringement is intended.
Previous: Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6 | Part 7
"Harry?"
Narcissa's voice pierced through his thoughts. "Hmm?"
He caught Draco frowning at him, but quickly looked away. "I'm sorry, what was that?"
She chuckled. "You seem a bit distracted."
There's an understatement. Why yes, Narcissa, as a matter of fact I am. While I’m sure this meal is perfectly lovely, I'd really rather be upstairs shagging your son. "I'm sorry," he said instead. "I'm afraid I'm a bit tired after our game."
She smiled warmly, then turned her gaze to Draco and back again. "Draco tells me you fell asleep while he was in the shower."
His eyes widened and he glanced desperately at Draco. What else had he told her? Draco's blank look told him nothing. "Er …"
"It's quite alright," she said. "I went through my NEWT year as well, and I know how hard they work you."
Harry lifted his napkin to his mouth in an attempt to cover the wash of relief that no doubt had just poured over his features. "I think it might have been all the fresh air out on the pitch."
"Of course, of course. You two were out there for a long time."
Harry smiled. This he could talk about. Quidditch was a great diversion. "It's wonderful out there. You have the greatest space for it, and those spells … well, they're incredible."
"So I understand."
Harry's mouth fell open. "You mean you don't fly out there yourself?"
She chuckled. "Heavens no."
A deep rumble announced Draco's amusement as well. "Perhaps you should, Mother."
"Oh, nonsense," she said and mock-slapped him with her napkin. "I'll leave that to you boys."
"I don't know," Harry said in challenge. "I know a few girls from school that would love to take a run at that pitch. The blokes too, of course." She raised her brows in interest. "I'm not kidding. Hogwarts is great and all that, but there's nothing quite like the privacy of a pitch away from the crowd. And yours? Well, it's incredible."
"Yes." Her voice was amused. "You've said that."
"Sorry, but it really is. Not just the spells controlling the temperature – Draco tells me they repel snow and rain as well – but the surroundings. The Manor grounds are spectacular, and the scent of the forest and gardens surrounding you when you're up in the air?" He breathed in deeply, as though he were back out there, then let out a long and contented sigh.
Draco looked at him curiously, as though he'd never seen him before. Realising he was quite probably making a fool of himself, he scooted back in his chair. Narcissa looked bemused, her eyes sparkling. "Yes, it is very much a beautiful home. I remember being equally enamoured by it the first time Lucius brought me here."
The mention of her husband threw an instant chill into the air. Harry at once stifled a shiver, recalling the first time he'd been to the Manor. "Well, anyway, I'm looking forward to everyone's reaction when I tell them how incr– er, how impressive the pitch is." He smiled wickedly. "They'll be so jealous."
Narcissa and Draco laughed and the frosty air warmed again.
After the dishes were cleared, Harry stood up, at once both anxious to get back to school and nervous about being alone with Draco again. He shook Narcissa's hand. "Thanks so much for having me to your home again, Narcissa."
"You're welcome any time, Harry." He wasn’t so sure that would be true if she'd seen them upstairs. "I would ask a favour of you, though."
He hesitated. Was this when she would start asking him to help Lucius or something else he was not prepared to do? He would do a lot for Draco, especially now, but his father was off limits. He was where he belonged and there he would stay. "Yes?"
"I wonder if I might keep my son here for a little longer. Would you mind making your way back to Hogwarts without him, just this time?"
He smiled, a weight lifted from his shoulders. "Of course not." Not only would this help Narcissa, but it would give Harry time to figure out how to apologise to Draco. Or something. "I'll just get my things and be on my way."
When Draco made to accompany him, panic rose in his chest. "It's okay. I think I can find my way."
"Nonsense," said Narcissa. "Lealia will show you back to Draco's room." No sooner had she spoken the name than the elf appeared.
Once again, Harry's heart settled. "See you back at school," he said to Draco, not meeting his eyes but unable to stop himself from glancing at those lips that he longed to taste once more. Who was he kidding? Once more would never be enough. He fled before he said or did something even more stupid.
***
Draco watched them leave, shaken by the mere glimpse Harry had given his mouth. Was he remembering their kiss too? Had it shaken him like it had Draco? He dragged his tongue over his lips but the taste of Harry was now gone. As absurd as it seemed, he wanted it back. He wanted that moment back. Harry's vulnerable features as he awoke and tried to focus. Harry's smile. Harry's touch. Harry's mouth.
"Well, that was a lovely visit." Narcissa's voice shook him out of his stupor and Draco turned to face her, willing himself to look less dazed than he felt.
He nodded. "It was nice to get back out on the pitch."
She grinned. "Harry seemed to enjoy that very much."
Harry's animated face swam before him again, his features alight with child-like enthusiasm and his contrasting voice describing things only truly appreciated as an adult. He was a contradiction unto himself, never ceasing to amaze Draco, no matter how much he thought he knew about him. "He did, didn't he?"
Narcissa studied him with that familiar gaze that made his skin crawl, like she could see everything inside him by merely concentrating enough. He used Occlumancy as a matter of habit by now, so he knew that not to be the case, but still. He couldn't help but feel she could see right through him.
"He's very important to you, isn't he?" she asked.
Surprised by the question, though he knew he shouldn't be, he took a while to answer. "He's become a good friend." Not the full truth of the matter, but it wasn't untrue.
"Your only one, perhaps?" Now she was treading on ground he might have found irritating at the start of term, but now … not so much.
He smiled weakly. "For a while, yes, I suppose he was. But I like to think things are changing, however slowly."
She reached out and grabbed his hand, pulling it to rest beneath her chin. "I'm so pleased." And she looked pleased. "He's a very important ally to have," she added.
Draco felt a sting of pain lance through him and he withdrew his hand from her grasp. "You sound like Father," he warned.
She didn't appear to pick up on his tone and ploughed ahead. "Perhaps, but it's true. He's a good person to have in your corner."
Anger bubbled inside until Draco thought he might explode. He expected things like this from his father, but not his mother. Lucius was the master manipulator and user of others. Narcissa, however pragmatic she'd been over the years, still had a heart. Or so he'd thought.
"Is that all you think people are?" he said without thinking or even trying to hide his outrage. "Tools to be manipulated or coerced into doing something for you? For me?" He stood up and began to pace. Before his mother could respond, he continued. "Harry is my friend. He is not someone I cozied up to in order to wave him about when I need something. He is a person with courage and convictions and feelings and a good heart and … and …" Words escaped him, he was so enraged. "You'll forgive me, Mother, but I think I need to leave before I say something I cannot take back."
"Sit down, Draco." Her words broached no argument.
He did not leave the room, but likewise he did not sit. "I think I'll stand, thanks."
"Very well." She crossed her hands and placed them in her lap. "You are right. Harry is a person and that is worth far more than an ally. I just wanted to be sure you felt the same way."
What? "Excuse me?"
"Please, sit." She motioned to his favourite chair and he sat down. "Do you remember, as a child, when you tried to befriend him?"
He winced inwardly. That still stung. "Yes."
"You'd been so disappointed, so upset."
Because he chose Weasley over me. He nodded.
"At the time, you'd gone after Harry Potter. You wanted to ally yourself with the Boy Who Lived. You weren't after friendship, you were after power."
"But …" She was right. He'd heard of Harry Potter since he'd been a small child. His father had hinted that the boy might be the next Dark Lord. And there could be no better person to have at your side.
"I see that the two of you seem to have grown quite close in a short time. I'm glad for you, Draco, but I can't help but worry, as a Mother. I don't want to see you set yourself up for disappointment again." She took a sip of her tea, letting her words settle before continuing. "That boy – that man is as genuine as they come. If you aren't the same, you'll lose whatever you've gained this year."
"Lose him as a friend, you mean?"
"I mean that Harry cares about people and trusts people. If he didn't, he never would have testified on our behalf, nor would he have accepted my invitation to lunch. But I don't think he would take too kindly to being manipulated, and I don't believe you'd want the wrath of Harry Potter following you through life."
He nodded. Never let it be said that Narcissa Malfoy was a stupid woman, no matter her choice in husband. She was his mother and would support him, no matter what, but she wasn't blind to his failings in the past.
"I'm not Father," he said, as much to reassure her as himself. "And I don't want to be." He saw a smile creep slowly across her face. "Not anymore."
***
When he returned to the school, it was with a somewhat heavy heart. His mother, no matter her brave front and anger at his actions, missed her husband. It would be a lonely Christmas for her this year. It seemed almost unfair that Draco had finally begun to move on with his life, but that she remained trapped in hers.
"Hey, Malfoy, you joining us in the Great Hall?"
He looked at Seamus, at the atrocity he was currently sporting. "What is that?"
Seamus beamed and twirled around slowly. "It's my ugly Christmas sweater. Isn't it great?"
Draco stood, inexplicably mesmerised by the elves on the front of the sweater hammering away, making toys and tossing them into a box. Once filled, the box toppled its contents into a cart which got wheeled away to the back of the sweater where another group of elves wrapped the toys and tossed them into Santa's sack for delivery. Like wizard pictures, the figures on Seamus' sweater moved about merrily, causing a dizzying feeling in the pit of Draco's stomach. "It's certainly ugly."
"I know, right?" He grinned madly. "You should get yourself one."
Draco nearly choked, imagining Narcissa's reaction to that. "No, I think I'm good."
"Suit yourself." He shrugged. "But you should come join us in the Hall."
Draco tried to ask why, but Seamus had already taken off. He decided to find out for himself, but not before going to his dorm and dropping off his things and the care package his mother had insisted he bring back with him.
As he approached the Great Hall, he heard boisterous laughter, spontaneous singing and much noise. He stopped at the door to watch the utter mayhem ensuing within. The house tables had been separated and rearranged into multiple craft tables, at which students and a couple of teachers made bows, wreaths, Christmas crackers and ornaments for the trees. He grinned as random plants whipped by overhead, coming to stop above pairs of people. When they looked up, laughed and leaned in for a kiss, he realised it was mistletoe.
He didn't see Harry anywhere, but for once didn't shy away. He could catch up with him later. Then they could talk – or not – about what had happened. He touched his lower lip absently, hoping that Harry felt the same way he did, but determined to make the most of what time he had left at Hogwarts regardless.
Seamus caught sight of him and waved him over to his table. Draco smiled and stepped into the fray.
Part 9